Hi! This is me, Cat Fud (pronounced kat food). This web site is mostly about what I think about some things like Star Trek or British Comedies. There is also some stuff that I have done, like coputer applications that I made. I have put in links to relevent places for more info on the subjects that I have on this site.
I hope that I have made navigation easy. Basically, all you do is click on a menu option (on the left side of the screen) that you would like to see, and it will come up in the main part of the window (where you are currently reading). Links to other web sites that I have put in will come up in a new window. That way you won't loose your place at this site.
If you have any questions or comments about this web site, just e-mail me.
One thing that is important to me iscreligion, specifically the Bahá'í Faith. This is, obviously, because I follow the writings, teachings, and laws of the Bahá'í Faith. My character is mostly attributable to the Bahá'í Faith. To me, a persons character does not entirely depend on their religion, because there are other factors that can effect a persons character, like interactions with family and friends.
Here is a link to the things that I am selling on E-Bay.
I'm considered to be in large family (I'm the oldest of 7 children). One thing about large families (at least in my family) is that there are lots of stories. There will be some here when I write them down.
I like to tell and listen to jokes. The jokes I like best are ones that are clean and funny. If you have any jokes that you like, please e-mail them to me.
Listed here are some jokes that I like. To read some jokes that I like, click the category of joke:
Knock Knock
Question
Story
Limerick
One Liners
Quotes
My jokes
I also like old and new comedy shows and movies, like the Marx Brothers, Charlie Chaplain movies, and British Comedies. Some British Comedies I like to watch are: Keeping Up Appearances, Are You Being Served?, and Mr. Bean (at Mr. Bean, Mr. Bean: The Cartoon, and All-in-One Mr. Bean).
Some of the British Comedies have been reruns for a while now, so they are getting a little boring. If you have any suggestions about any other funny movies or shows that I could watch, please e-mail me.
For the list of Knock Knock jokes I like, I won't put the usual Knock Knock ... Who's there? part of the joke. I think that would get rather monotonous after a while. So what I'll do is just put the name, then the punchline on a separate line. There will be a blank line between jokes. So, with no further adu:
Amos
Amos-quito bit me.
Andy
Andy bit me again.
Repeat
Ok, Who who who ...
(I know Repeat isn't a name, but I thought it was funny anyway.)
These don't take up much space. I'll put up as many as I think are funny.
Did you hear hat the Stop&Shop is merging with the A&P? They're calling the stores the Stop&P.
I think that there are some pretty good limericks out there. Those are the ones that I'll put here. Some are worded so that some people wouldn't dare say them in public (or even want to hear at all). You won't see those here.
A fellow at college named Breeze,
Weighted down by B.A.'s and M.D.'s
Collapsed from the strain;
Said his doctor, "It's plain
You are killing yourself by degrees!"
There was a maiden of Leeds,
Who swallowed six packets of seeds.
In a month, silly lass,
She was covered with grass.
And she couldn't sit down for the weeds.
Here is the section where I will present all the jokes that I came up with.
Disclaimer:
That said, enjoy the jokes.
This is a picture from an artical in the newspaper. The origional headline was "Got milk (intolerance)?" I thought it would be funnier if it said food instead of milk, because someone I know is a rather picky eater.
Here is a picture I took of one of the dogs, Tater. I was teasing him with a toy on the edge of the couch. I thought it was pretty funny; I think it looks like he's laughing.
I think that for holloween, Tic Tacs should be made in the shape of toes. That way, we could all have Tic Tac Toes.
Here is a sound that I have made. It is a list of items that I want for Ayyam-I-Ha. They are items that I put together from clips of different Weird Al songs.
Funny IndexMarch is the month God created to show people who don't drink what a hang-over is like. -- Garrison Keiller
Did you ever hear the cookie joke? No? Well, you don't want too, either. It's crumby.
What do you get if you cross a caterpillar and a parrot?
A walkie-talkie.
What do you get if you cross a porcupine and a turtle?
A slow-poke.
What do you get if you cross a cat and a canary?
A satisfied cat and a dead bird.
How much do pirates pay for earrings?
A buccaneer.
What does a thieves son do?
He takes after his father.
What's the difference between a tree and a train?
One sheds it's leaves, and the other leaves it's shed.
At a bait shop, there were some minnows on sale. The sign read: "All you can carry, $1". This guy, who wasn't all that smart, told the person behind the counter "Give me two dollars worth."
Little Miss Muffit sat on a tuffit, eating her curds and whey. Along came a spider, sat down beside her, and she ate that too.
A bus stops at a bus station. A train stops at a train station. Now you know why it's called a workstation.
I started using computers since I was young. I remember in grade school, about 1st grade or so, when we had computer class. The computers we used were the Apple IIes. They had either the green or amber (orange) screens. In the computer class, we were introduced to programming in LOGO. We also got to play games. My favorite game was Oregon Trail. It still is; although there are more recent games I also like to play, like the Myst series of games.
Compared to the computers in the late 70's and early 80's, there is lots of computing power in todays computers (more RAM, cpu speed, etc). When computers first come out, they have the best graphics, sound, and most computing power. Even with all the more power in current computer, one the reasons I like the old stuff is because I think the games are still interesting and fun. Some of the old games I like are Pac-Man, Qix, Pitfall, Super Mario Brothers, and Donkey Kong. All these games are playable on an original Nintendo or earlier. As interesting as old stuff is to me, I still like to keep up with new stuff when I can.
Below, you will find programs that I have made in various languages for different computers in a table. If you click on the title of the software, you will be automatically be scrolled to the description of the software. You can also scroll through the descriptions yourself. I hope there is something useful here. If you have any ideas or comments on the programs I made, or have any new ideas, you can e-mail me your ideas.
cbaspad programs are BASIC, and PocketC programs are C/C++.
You may be wondering why I made a couple PalmPilot programs in both BASIC and C for the PalmPilot. This is because the C programs run faster (since they are compiled), and I had made the program in BASIC before I got PocketC.
If you have any ideas on programs you would like made, or comments on the ones I already made, you can e-mail me your ideas.
Here is a collection of some of the pictures I have taken with my digital camera. I have tried to keep the pictures small, so that they will come up quickly enough on a modem connection. I will also have a little description of each picture (or group of pictures). Enjoy.
Here are some pictures of chickadees.
Here is a panorama of a sunset I made out of 3 pictures.
Here are some closeups of different insects. See if you know their name, then move the mouse over the picture. The name of the insect can then be seen in the status bar (at the bottom of the window).
